telebookstall

Sometimes I really enjoy listening to pure music, not because it sounds good, but because I don't want too much noise or complete silence. It's like the internet, connecting to a distant place, just the right amount of connection. The changes in melody lead to changes in mood, like the feeling of a teacher holding your hand to write when you were in elementary school. Restless emotions become calm like a lake because the music is not intense.

Lately, I have been laughing from time to time, feeling a bit bittersweet, remembering people and things, and capturing emotions that once existed.

I once read a book that I thought was beautiful, that's all. A friend (A) mentioned it later, saying that this book was very popular and trendy, but very few people understood it. The book describes the life of a person who realizes they are a strange person from birth to death. Thinking about it, I suddenly feel that stories are really poignant. Just a few sheets of paper can make people constantly look back and reveal their own emotions. He told me that this book is one of his favorite books, but he doesn't talk about it with others because they don't understand.

I once told A, "I don't know what you're thinking." People are like isolated islands. Although we can never reach each other, I want to know what it's like on your side. I have forgotten how he responded, but it was clear that later on, I did catch a glimpse of some scenery on his side.

Am I a strange person? When saying this, many people might think it's a bit arrogant. But in reality, the instinct of the crowd suppresses this strangeness. Regardless of whether you are truly strange or not.

I still don't know if I am strange, but one thing is certain, the more I think, the more I am left behind by the crowd. And that book, since A pointed it out, I often think about it.

A finds it difficult to communicate with others and likes to observe them. Once, when discussing fitting in with the group, I said, "Someone like you, even if someone is with you all the time, you still don't fit in." We both laughed.

In fact, the characters in the book hope to be like ordinary people, which hurts deeply. He longs for his own kind, but unfortunately, he is very special. And he is also a great actor, just like A, who appears very normal. I belong to the kind with poor acting skills, unfortunately, my processor can't handle so many models, so I appear strange, like a strange person, and it makes people feel proud.

Strange doesn't need much explanation, just a little less similarity with others. In many cases, not fitting in. Less understanding, more random thoughts.

And that book is called "No Longer Human," written by Osamu Dazai.

Once, A and I were playing the same video game, and A said, "You seem to be playing differently from me." I said, "Of course." He said, "Most people would say we are playing the same game." If there are differences in how we read books, please understand. 😁